A Witches Bible - Janet Farrar, Stewar Farrar 1981
Wiccaning
Birth, Marriage & Death
The Sabbats and Rites for Birth, Marriage and Death
This is a book of suggested rituals for those who need to use them and who find them suitable. It is therefore not the place to debate the difficult question of the religious upbringing of children. But we think one point should be made.
Christians, when they have their children christened, do so on the whole with the intention of committing them to Christianity, preferably for life — and to the parents’ own particular brand of Christianity, at that. The usual hope is that the children will endorse that commitment at confirmation, when they are old enough to acquiesce consciously (though without mature judgement). To be fair, such parents — when they are not merely following social convention — often act in this way because they sincerely believe it is essential for the safety of their children’s souls. They have been taught to believe it and often frightened into believing it. (A young Christian friend of ours, heavily pregnant, was warned by the doctor that the child might be born dead; she sobbed in our arms, terrified that her baby would go to Hell if it did not live long enough to be baptized. She was theologically mistaken even in terms of her own creed; but her terror was all too typical. We are glad to say that her baby son, though late, was born fine and healthy.)
This belief, that there is only one kind of ticket to Heaven and that a baby must be given it with all speed for its own safety, is of course alien to Wicca. Witches’ belief in reincarnation denies it in any case. But quite apart from that, witches hold the view which was virtually universal before the era of patriarchal monotheism — namely, that all religions are different ways of expressing the same truths and that their validity for any particular individual depends on his nature and needs.
A wiccaning ceremony for the child of a witch family does not, therefore, commit the child to any one path, even a Wiccan one. It is similar to a christening in that it invokes Divine protection for the child and ritually affirms the love and care with which the family and friends wish to surround the newcomer. It differs from a christening in that it specifically acknowledges that, as the child matures into an adult, it will, and indeed must, decide on its own path.
Wicca is above all a natural religion — so witch parents will naturally try to communicate to their children the joy and fulfilment their religion gives them, and the whole family will inevitably share in its way of life. Sharing is one thing; imposing or dictating is another, and, far from ensuring a child’s ’salvation’, may well retard it — if, as witches do, you regard salvation not as a kind of instant transaction but as a development over many lifetimes.
We have composed our wiccaning ritual in this spirit, and we think that most witches will agree with the attitude.
We knew that the idea of having godparents — adult friends who will take a continuing personal interest in the child’s development — was a justifiably popular one; and we felt that a wiccaning ceremony should allow for it too. At first we called these adult friends ’sponsors’, to avoid confusion with Christian practice. But on further consideration we saw that ’sponsor’ was a cold word and that there was no reason at all why ’godfather’ and ’godmother’ (if ’god’ be taken to include ’goddess’) should not serve for witches as well as Christians. After all, given the differences of belief (and Christians differ among themselves, God knows), including the difference of attitude we have already mentioned, the function is the same.
Godparents do not necessarily have to be witches themselves; that is up to the parents. But they must at least be in sympathy with the intent of the rite and have read it through beforehand, to make sure they can make the necessary promises in all sincerity. (The same would apply, after all, to witches who were asked by Christian friends to be godparents at a church baptism.)
If the High Priestess and/or High Priest are themselves standing as godparents, they will make the promises to each other at the appropriate moments in the ritual.
There is a story attached to this ritual of ours which is both funny and sad. We wrote it originally in 1971, and we gave a copy to a High Priest friend who we thought might like to have it. A couple of years later, an American witch friend was visiting us, and we happened to describe our wiccaning to him in conversation. He laughed and said: “But I’ve read that ritual. Last time I was in London, — showed it to me. He said he’d got it from a very old traditional source.”
By such irresponsibility are apocryphal stories launched; and they do no good to Wicca at all. Besides, we have since amended the ritual slightly in the light of experience — so will people who know of the original now accuse us of ’tampering with tradition’? It could happen!
Following Wiccan patterns, we have suggested that the High Priest should preside at the wiccaning of a girl child, and the High Priestess at that of a boy. To avoid lengthy repetition, we give the ritual for a girl child in full, and then indicate the differences for a boy child.
The Preparation
If the coven normally works skyclad, the decision whether the ritual shall be skyclad or robed shall on this occasion rest with the parents. In either case, the High Priestess shall wear symbols of the Moon, and the High Priest symbols of the Sun.
The Circle is marked with flowers and greenery, and the cauldron placed in the centre, filled with the same, and perhaps with fruit as well.
Consecrating oil is placed ready on the altar.
Only very light incense should be used — preferably joss-sticks.
Gifts for the child are placed beside the altar, and food and drink for a little party in the Circle after the ritual.
The parents should choose beforehand a ’hidden name’ for the child. (This is largely for the child’s own benefit; growing up in a witch family, he or she will almost certainly like having a private ’witch name’ just as Mummy and Daddy do — and if not, it can be quietly forgotten until and unless its owner wants to use it again.)
The Ritual for a Girl Child
The Opening Ritual proceeds as usual up to the end of the “Great God Cernunnos” invocation, except that everyone, including the parents and child, is in the Circle before the casting, seated in a semicircle close to the cauldron and facing towards the altar — leaving room for the High Priestess to cast the Circle around them. Only the High Priestess and High Priest are standing, to conduct the Opening Ritual. To cut down excessive movement which might frighten the child, the High Priestess casts the Circle with her athame, not the sword; and nobody moves with her, or copies her gestures, when she invokes the Lords of the Watchtowers. She and the High Priest carry round the elements.
After the “Great God Cernunnos” invocation, the High Priestess and High Priest consecrate the wine. They do not taste it but place the chalice on the altar.
The High Priest then stands before the altar, facing the cauldron. The High Priestess stands ready to hand him the oil, wine and water.
The High Priest says:
“We are met in this Circle to ask the blessing of the mighty God and the gentle Goddess on — , the daughter of — and — , so that she may grow in beauty and strength, in joy and wisdom. There are many paths, and each must find his own; therefore we do not seek to bind — to any one path while she is still too young to choose.
Rather do we ask the God and the Goddess, who know all paths, and to whom all paths lead, to bless, protect and prepare her through the years of her childhood; so that when at last she is truly grown, she shall know without doubt or fear which path is hers and shall tread it gladly.
“ — , mother of — , bring her forward that she may be blessed.”
The father helps the mother to rise, and both of them bring the child to the High Priest, who takes her in his arms (firmly, or she will feel insecure — too many clergymen make that mistake!). He asks:
“ — , mother of — , has this your child also a hidden name?”
The mother replies:
“Her hidden name is — .”
The High Priest then anoints the child on the forehead with oil, marking a pentagram and saying:
“I anoint thee, — (ordinary name), with oil, and give thee the hidden name of — .”
He repeats the action with wine, saying:
“I anoint thee, — (hidden name), with wine, in the name of the mighty God Cernunnos.”
He repeats the action with water, saying:
“I anoint thee, — (hidden name), with water, in the name of the gentle Goddess Aradia.”
The High Priest gives the child back to the mother and then leads the parents and child to each of the Watchtowers in turn, saying:
“Ye Lords of the Watchtowers of the East (South, West, North), we do bring before you — , whose hidden name is — , and who has been duly anointed within the Wiccan Circle. Hear ye, therefore, that she is under the protection of Cernunnos and Aradia.”
The High Priest and High Priestess take their places facing the altar, with the parents and child between them. They raise their arms and call in turn:
High Priest: “Mighty Cernunnos, bestow upon this child the gift of strength.”
High Priestess: “Gentle Aradia, bestow upon this child the gift of beauty.”
High Priest: “Mighty Cernunnos, bestow upon this child the gift of wisdom.”
High Priestess: “Gentle Aradia, bestow upon this child the gift of love.”
The High Priest, High Priestess and parents turn to face into the Circle, and the High Priest then asks:
“Are there two in the Circle who would stand as godparents to — ?”
(If he and the High Priestess are standing as godparents, he will ask instead: “Is there one in the Circle who will stand with me, as godparents to — ?” and the High Priestess answers: “I will join with you.” They then face each other and speak the questions and the promises to each other.)
The godparents come forward and stand, the godmother facing the High Priest, and the godfather facing the High Priestess.
The High Priest asks the godmother:
“Do you, — , promise to be a friend to — throughout her childhood, to aid and guide her as she shall need; and in concord with her parents, to watch over her and love her as if she were of your own blood, till by the grace of Cernunnos and Aradia she shall be ready to choose her own path?”
The godmother replies:
“I, — , do so promise.”
The High Priestess asks the godfather:
“Do you, — , promise …” etc., as above.
The godfather replies:
“I, — , do so promise.”
The High Priest says:
“The God and the Goddess have blessed her;
The Lords of the Watchtowers have acknowledged her;
We her friends have welcomed her;
Therefore, O Circle of Stars,
Shine in peace on — ,
Whose hidden name is — .
So mote it be.”
All say:
“So mote it be.”
The High Priest says:
“Let all be seated within the Circle.”
All sit down, except the High Priest and High Priestess, who taste and pass round the already-consecrated wine in the usual way and then consecrate and pass round the cakes in the usual way.
They then fetch the gifts and the party food and drink and sit down with the others, and the proceedings become informal.
The Ritual for a Boy Child
The basic difference if the child is a boy is that the High Priest and High Priestess exchange duties. She makes the opening statement and performs the anointing, the High Priest handing her the oil, wine and water. She presents the child to the Watchtowers.
The call to the God and Goddess for their gifts of strength, beauty, wisdom and love, however, is made exactly as for a girl child, and in the same order.
The High Priestess calls forward the godparents and takes the godfather’s promise; the High Priest then takes the godmother’s promise.
The High Priestess pronounces the final blessing.