Magical Almanac: Practical Magic for Everyday Living - Lauryn Heineman 2018

Bad Magickal Breakups by Najah Lightfoot
Water Magic

Betrayal. Revenge. Promises broken, vows tainted. I would bury thee, I would spit at thee, I would rail at thee. I would take thine image, carve it into a candle, and bury it in a graveyard. I howl at the Moon. I weep, I cry. I tear at my hair, burn my clothes. The Sun sheds no light upon me and I am trapped in an eyeless fog. All is suspect. I trust no one. Jealousy, envy, rage, and anger are my constant companions.

What has happened to me?

I’ve had a bad magickal breakup. It happens. It happens in covens, groves, groups, and communities. It happens between friends, teachers, and your best magickal buddies. And when it

happens to you, as oft times it will when you set upon the magickal path, it can break your heart and burn your soul.

It’s a hush-hush subject. No one wants to talk about it or admit it has happened to them. A bad magickal breakup leaves you feeling vulnerable and scared. It can haunt your dreams and cloud your waking moments.

Loss and Separation in the

Magickal Community

Separation for any reason is hard. Lovers leave us, spouses get divorced, and friendships fall apart. Breakups are some of the most difficult things we experience as social creatures. As human beings, we long for family, community, society. The desire to come together is encoded in our DNA. Since the dawn of our species, we have come together as tribes, clans, families, and partners. We thrive when we come together.

When those ties are broken, it can take us a lifetime to recover, if we ever do. It can take days, weeks, or months of soul-searching therapy. It can take ten thousand nights of crying on a best friend’s shoulder or even picking up and moving away to a new place to recover. It some cases it may even take more than one lifetime to recover. However long it takes, one thing is for sure: it takes courage, strength, and long, hard, and sometimes painful work to pull yourself up and move forward. And once you do move forward, it can be extremely difficult to trust someone again.

Now take the power of those romantic, familial, or friendship breakups and add magickal vows or covenants to them. Add the vulnerability of trusting a teacher, a leader, a high priest or priestess, a guru, a mambo, or a hougan with your magickal training, your scarlet cord or soul in a clay pot. If the relationship works, you’ve got a recipe for success, trust, and guidance on the highest level, but if it doesn’t, you can be left with a burnt casserole that will reek forever and never taste sweet again.

The path of a seeker, novice, or apprentice can be a hard, lonely, rocky road. It twists and turns, leads you down dark paths, and constantly makes you second-guess yourself. It tests your strength, your will, and your passion. As seekers, we long for guidance, but it can be extremely difficult to find teachers or people you can trust and believe in to guide you and help you grow in your chosen path. There are many people out there who say they can and will lead, but sometimes you end up with charlatans or someone in the position for their own selfish and egotistical gains, who harms countless people and damages many a soul, while they pump up their own false images of pomp and grandeur.

As we travel our magickal paths, we need to be careful. We need to use discernment. But even the most cynical and jaded of us will get our fingers burnt and our hearts torn from time to time. Perhaps it doesn’t happen to us as often because we’ve got callouses on our hearts to protect us, earned from surviving setbacks, betrayals, and disappointments.

More often than not the ones who get really hurt are the new ones, the novices, the seekers early on their path, who mistakenly get trapped by hooded robes, “secret” knowledge, and vague promises—promises given but rarely kept.

Yet all the great ones have been down this road and survived it. Those who walk their path with integrity and substance have fallen into the snares, been caught in the brambles, and clawed their way out of the stink and emerged as true leaders and trusted members of the community. They’ve earned respect. They’ve dealt with the pain of betrayal and broken promises and turned it into something good. They’ve maintained good relationships and kept bridges intact, none of it easy, none of it worthless.

Sadness and Betrayal: How to Cope

When You Lose a Magickal Teacher

So if bad juju gets dumped on you, what can you do? How can you survive it?

First and foremost, swaddle yourself in the most loving environment you can find. Lean on a trusted friend. Don’t tell everyone; maybe only one or two people you believe you can trust, and definitely don’t blast it on social media. Social media rants can harm you, your family, or innocent people in ways you may not have considered.

Shut down, shut in. If there aren’t people in your circle of friends and family you can trust with your emotions and situation, find a therapist. There’s nothing better than spilling out your heart to a trained and licensed professional who has no skin in the game other than to help you heal.

Work empowering magick. You may need to burn magickal items, which connect you to the person. You may need to deeply cleanse your home with salt and vinegar and burn smudge bundles to smoke out negative entities. You may need to sit in a graveyard and cry, and then bury a candle that contains all your hurt feelings. You might even need to carve your words of hurt onto a figural candle, light its head on fire, and then flush the remains down the toilet!

Remember, you are a magickal person. Even though you have been harmed, had your soul burnt and singed, the magick belongs to the universe, and you can still use it for your own healing. Even if you took vows or covenants with persons, groves, organizations, temples, or houses, the knowledge you gained ultimately belongs to the universe and is there for all who choose to seek it. Your deities, gods and goddesses, guides, and angels still love you. They will be there when you call upon them. If you no longer choose to work with the powers you used when you were in the relationship with those who hurt you, that’s okay too. The magickal universe is a vast place, and you may find a better fit with new deities and guides as you heal yourself from the pain of bad juju.

As your heart burns and smolders, you may feel called to work spells of revenge. Caution! Even the best and justified intentions can boomerang. Take much time and thought before you venture down that path. Be very sure of your intentions before you act upon them, for even if the work is justified, it will still come at a cost to you. Be ready to do much cleanup and face fear within yourself if you choose this route. Take a breath, write your feelings down, and throw tarot cards. Pour your feelings out in a forest or a sacred grove of trees. You may also find this simple spell helpful:

During a waning Moon cycle, write down all your negative feelings and emotions. Try not to censor your feelings as you write them down. Allow your pen to be your magickal wand of power. Take a moment and read what you have written. Embrace the power of the moment and anoint the paper with eucalyptus essential oil. Light the paper on fire and burn it in a fireproof container. Carry the ashes to a crossroads and dump them. Take a different route home. Feel the power of giving your worries to Spirit.

Last, take some time and walk away. While we can expend much energy trying to change other people, in the end we can only change ourselves. It’s hard to walk away. It’s hard to let go. But sometimes after you’ve done all that is magickally possible to heal yourself, walking away can be the best answer. Nasty people deserve to be with nasty people. Let them eat each other while you dine somewhere else. You never know what bright, shiny treat may be waiting for you in a different restaurant.

And give yourself a break. Try not to beat yourself up too much. What has happened to you has probably happened to other people who came in contact with that person, group, or organization. You may find that when you move on, others who have had similar experiences will show up in your life, and you may be able to build solid new relationships with those who suffered similarly.

In the end, try not to give up on your magickal path. You were called to it for a reason. Sometimes the bad shows up to test your commitment, courage, and faith. Sometimes you’re becoming a stronger Witch and for your growth you need to be tempered in the fires, even though it hurts like hell. There’s a reason why the mystics and ancient ones had to face dark caves, minotaurs, nights buried in graves, and vision quests on lonely mountaintops. These tests of the soul build spiritual strength and confidence.

Should you choose to carry on after your heart has been broken and healed, know you will be a stronger, more capable Witch, priest or priestess, healer, or conjurer. Know your trials and tests will not have been in vain. After all is said and done, you never know what goodness may come. Perhaps one day you may be the one to help someone else when they fall into the snares of broken vows and covenants.

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About the Contributors

ELIZABETH BARRETTE has been involved with the Pagan community for more than twenty-seven years. She has served as managing editor of PanGaia and dean of studies at the Grey School of Wizardry. Her book Composing Magic: How to Create Magical Spells, Rituals, Blessings, Chants, and Prayers explains how to combine writing and spirituality. She lives in central Illinois. Visit her blog The Wordsmith’s Forge (ysabetwordsmith.livejournal.com) or website PenUltimate Productions (penultimateproductions.weebly.com).

BLAKE OCTAVIAN BLAIR is a shamanic practitioner, ordained minister, writer, Usui Reiki Master-Teacher, tarot reader, and musical artist. Blake incorporates mystical traditions from both the East and West with a reverence for the natural world into his own brand of spirituality. Blake holds a degree in English and religion from the University of Florida. He is an avid reader, knitter, crafter, pescatarian, and member of the Order of Bards, Ovates, and Druids (OBOD). Blake lives in the New England region of the United States with his beloved husband. Visit him at www.blakeoctavianblair.com or write him at blake@blakeoctavianblair.com.

DEBORAH BLAKE is the award-winning author of the Baba Yaga and Broken Rider paranormal romance series and the Veiled Magic urban fantasies. She has also written The Goddess Is in the Details, Everyday Witchcraft and numerous other books, along with a popular tarot deck. She writes the ongoing column Everyday Witchcraft in Witches & Pagans. Deborah can be found online at Facebook, Twitter, her popular blog (Writing the Witchy Way), and www.deborahblakeauthor.com. She lives in a 130-year-old farmhouse in rural upstate New York with various cats who supervise all her activities, both magickal and mundane.

DEBORAH CASTELLANO is a frequent contributor to occult/Pagan sources such as the Llewellyn annual almanacs, PaganSquare, and Witches & Pagans. She blogs at Charmed, I’m Sure. Deborah’s book, Glamour Magic: The Witchcraft Revolution to Get What You Want, was published with Llewellyn in the summer of 2017. She resides in New Jersey with her husband, Jow, and their cat.

Dr. ALEXANDRA CHAURAN (Port Moody, BC) is a second-generation fortune-teller, a high priestess of British Traditional Wicca, and the queen of a coven. As a professional psychic intuitive for over a decade, she has served psychic apprentices and thousands of clients. She received a master’s in teaching from Seattle University and a doctorate from Valdosta State University and is certified in tarot. She can be found online at SeePsychic.com.

CHIC AND S. TABATHA CICERO are Chief Adepts of the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn as reestablished by their mentor, Israel Regardie. (Visit www.hermeticgoldendawn.org.) The Ciceros have written numerous books, including The Essential Golden Dawn, Self-Initiation into the Golden Dawn Tradition, The Golden Dawn Magical Tarot, and Tarot Talismans. Both are prominent Rosicrucians: Chic is currently Chief Adept of the Florida College of the SRICF and Tabatha is Imperatrix of the SRIA in America (www.sria.org).

DALLAS JENNIFER COBB practices gratitude magic, giving thanks for personal happiness, health, and prosperity; meaningful, flexible, and rewarding work; and a deliciously joyful life. She lives in paradise with her daughter in a waterfront village in rural Ontario, where she regularly swims, runs, and snowshoes. A Reclaiming Witch from way back, Jennifer is part of an eclectic pan-Pagan circle that organizes empowered and beautiful community rituals. Contact her at jennifer.cobb@live.com.

MONICA CROSSON is the author of The Magickal Family: Pagan Living in Harmony with Nature and Summer Sage. She is a Master Gardener who lives in the beautiful Pacific Northwest, happily digging in the dirt and tending her raspberries with her husband, three kids, three goats, two dogs, two cats, many chickens, and Rosetta the donkey. She has been a practicing Witch for twenty-five years and is a member of Blue Moon Coven. Monica is a regular contributor to Llewellyn’s annuals.

MELISSA CYNOVA is owner of Little Fox Tarot and has been slinging tarot cards and teaching classes since 1989. She can be found in the St. Louis area and online for personal readings, parties, and beginner and advanced tarot classes. Her first book, Kitchen Table Tarot, was released in 2017. Melissa lives in St. Louis with her outstanding kids, her sweet husband, Joe, two cats, two dogs, and a tortoise named Phil. When she’s not slinging cards, she’s enjoying her tribe and probably watching a superhero movie while reading a book. Find her on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram.

AUTUMN DAMIANA is an author, artist, crafter, and amateur photographer. She is a Solitary Eclectic Cottage Witch who has been following her Pagan path for almost two decades and is a regular contributor to Llewellyn’s annuals. Along with writing and making art, Autumn has a degree in early childhood education. She lives with her husband and doggy familiar in the beautiful San Francisco Bay Area. Visit her online at www.autumndamiana.com.

RAVEN DIGITALIS (Missoula, MT) is the author of Esoteric Empathy and three other books with Llewellyn. He is a Neopagan Priest and cofounder of a nonprofit multicultural temple called Opus Aima Obscuræ (OAO). Raven has been an earth-based practitioner since 1999, a Priest since 2003, a Freemason since 2012, and an empath all of his life. Visit him at www.ravendigitalis.com and www.opusaimaobscurae.org.

STORM FAERYWOLF is a professional author, teacher, Warlock, and coowner of the Mystic Dream, a spiritual supply store where he teaches and offers services to the public. An initiate of the Faery tradition with over thirty years’ experience practicing Witchcraft, he has been teaching for more than twenty-five. He holds the Black Wand of a Master and is the author of Betwixt & Between: Exploring the Faery Tradition of Witchcraft. He is a founding teacher of the Black Rose school of witchcraft and travels internationally teaching the magical arts. Visit faerywolf.com.

KATE FREULER lives in Ontario, Canada, with her husband and daughter. She owns and operates www.whitemoonwitchcraft.com, an online witchcraft boutique. When she isn’t crafting spells and amulets for clients or herself, she loves to write, paint, read, draw, and create.

JUSTINE HOLUBETS is a Solitary Wiccan practicing ancient Egyptian sacred traditions living in Lviv, Ukraine. She holds a tarot certificate from the British Astrological Psychic Society and works as a tarot and lunar rhythms/astrology consultant for Zodiaclivetarot.com in the UK. A published author focused on philosophical, social, and gender issues, she currently studies psychology at University of Roehampton online and prepares courses to help women maintain healthy, dignified intercultural relationships. Visit http://www.zodiaclivetarotreading.com/tarot-reader?id=129.

JAMES KAMBOS became interested in magic as a child after watching his grandmother perform spells she learned growing up in Greece. He has a degree in history and geography from Ohio University. He lives in the rural hill country of Southern Ohio.

TIFFANY LAZIC is a registered psychotherapist and spiritual director with a private practice in individual, couples, and group therapy, and the owner of the Hive and Grove Centre for Holistic Wellness in Kitchener (Canada). She created and teaches two self-development programs and is a frequent guest facilitator at Transformational Arts College of Spiritual and Holistic Training in Toronto (Canada). Tiffany is the author of The Great Work: Self-Knowledge and Healing Through the Wheel of the Year. Visit www.hiveandgrove.ca.

NAJAH LIGHTFOOT is a writer and contributor for Llewellyn Publications. She is a sister-priestess of the divine feminine, a martial artist, and an active member of the Denver Pagan community. She keeps her magick strong through the indigenous practices of her ancestors, the folk magick of Hoodoo, Pagan rituals, and her belief in the mysteries of the universe. Find her online at www.twitter.com/NajahLightfoot, www.facebook.com/NajahLightfoot, and www.craftandconjure.com.

JASON MANKEY is a Wiccan Witch, writer, and wannabe rock and roller. He has been a part of the greater Pagan community for over twenty years and has spent nearly half that time teaching and speaking at Pagan conventions across the United States and Canada. He has written The Witch’s Athame and The Witch’s Book of Shadows and is also the channel manager of Patheos Pagan online. He lives in Sunnyvale, California, where he and his wife, Ari, help lead two local covens. Because they don’t want to be outnumbered, Ari and Jason only have two cats.

ESTHA K. V. MCNEVIN (Missoula, MT) is a priestess and ceremonial oracle of Opus Aima Obscuræ, a nonprofit Pagan Temple Haus. She has served the Pagan community since 2003 as an Eastern Hellenistic officiate, lecturer, freelance author, artist, and poet. In addition to hosting public rituals for the sabbats, Estha organizes annual philanthropic fundraisers, Full Moon spell-crafting ceremonies, and women’s divination rituals for each Dark Moon. To learn more, please explore www.opusaimaobscurae.org.

MICKIE MUELLER explores magic and spirituality through art and the written word at her home studio and workshop in Missouri. She is the author/illustrator of The Voice of the Trees, the illustrator of Mystical Cats Tarot and Magical Dogs Tarot, and author of The Witch’s Mirror and Llewellyn’s Little Book of Halloween. Since 2007, Mickie has been a regular article and illustration contributor to Llewellyn’s almanacs and annuals and many Llewellyn books. Her art has been seen as set dressing on SyFy’s The Magicians and Bravo’s Girlfriend’s Guide to Divorce. Visit her online at MickieMuellerStudio.etsy.com

DIANA RAJCHEL has practiced magic since childhood. She lives in San Francisco, where she runs the Emperor Norton Pagan Social and handles the oft-squirrely city spirit. She is the author of the Mabon and Samhain books in the Llewellyn Sabbat Essentials Series and of the Diagram Prize—nominee Divorcing a Real Witch.

SUZANNE RESS runs a small farm in the alpine foothills of Italy, where she lives with her husband. She has been a practicing Pagan for as long as she can remember and was recently featured in the exhibit “Worldwide Witches” at the Hexenmuseum of Switzerland. She is the author of The Trial of Goody Gilbert.

CHARLYNN WALLS resides with her family in Central Missouri. She holds a BA in anthropology with an emphasis in archaeology. She is acting CEO of Correllian Education Ministry, which oversees Witch School. She is an active member of the St. Louis Pagan Community and is a part of a local area coven. She writes for Witches & Pagans, in Llewellyn’s annuals, and on her blog, Sage Offerings (www.sageofferings.net).

CHARLIE RAINBOW WOLF is happiest when she is creating something, especially if it can be made from items that others have cast aside. Pottery, writing, knitting, astrology, and tarot are her deepest interests, but she happily confesses that she’s easily distracted, because life offers so many wonderful things to explore. She is an advocate of organic gardening and cooking and lives in the Midwest with her husband and special-needs Great Danes. Visit her at www.charlierainbow.com.

STEPHANIE WOODFIELD (Brookfield, CT) has been a practicing Witch for over fourteen years and a priestess for ten years. Her lifelong love of Irish mythology led to a close study of Celtic Witchcraft. A natural clairvoyant and empath, she has worked as a tarot card reader and is ordained as a minister with the Universal Life Church.

LAURA TEMPEST ZAKROFF can be described as a professional artist, author, dancer, designer, muse, mythpunk, teacher, and Witch. She has been a practicing Modern Traditional Witch for over two decades and blogs for Patheos in A Modern Traditional Witch and Witches & Pagans in Fine Art Witchery. She is the author of Sigil Witchery and The Witch’s Cauldron and coauthored The Witch’s Altar with Jason Mankey. Laura resides in Seattle, WA, and can be found online at www.lauratempestzakroff.com.

NATALIE ZAMAN is the author of Color and Conjure and Magical Destinations of the Northeast. A regular contributor to various Llewellyn annual publications, she also writes the recurring feature Wandering Witch for Witches & Pagans. When not on the road, she’s busy tending her magical back garden. Visit Natalie online at nataliezaman.blogspot.com.