MORNING - Everyday Cook - Alton Brown

Everyday Cook - Alton Brown (2016)

MORNING

Breakfast Carbonara

FEEDS 4 TO 6

The way I look at it, if you’re going to eat pasta on a regular basis, you should probably have it for breakfast so you’ve got the whole day to work it off. With that in mind, I offer this riff on carbonara that delivers eggs, sausage, toast, and even a bit of citrus.

Now…where will I put that Nobel?

1 tablespoon grated orange zest

¼ cup fresh flat-leaf parsley leaves, finely chopped

¼ cup fresh bread crumbs M

1 tablespoon kosher salt

8 ounces dry linguine, preferably whole wheat

8 ounces breakfast sausage

2 scallions, thinly sliced

4 large eggs, at room temperature

3 ounces finely grated Pecorino Romano

1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

1. Combine the orange zest, parsley and bread crumbs in a small bowl. Set aside.

2. Add 2 quarts water, the salt and linguine to a large sauté pan. Cover and bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Reduce the heat to low and cook for 4 minutes, or until the pasta is al dente. M

3. Meanwhile, cook the sausage in a 12-inch cast-iron skillet H over medium-high heat until brown. Add the scallions and cook until fragrant.

4. While the pasta and sausage are cooking, whisk together the eggs, Pecorino and pepper.

5. Drain the pasta, reserving ¼ cup of the starchy water. Add the pasta to the sausage, tossing the pasta to coat in the fat.

6. Remove from the heat, add the egg mixture, and thin as needed with additional pasta water.

7. Serve immediately with a generous sprinkle of the parsley mixture.

Breakfast Carbonara

Always Perfect Oatmeal

FEEDS 2

If you think about it before going to bed, go ahead and put the water, oats and salt in the pot and let it sit overnight. The cooking will go even faster.

120 grams thick rolled oats (1 cup)

25 grams quinoa (unrinsed) P

475 grams water (2 cups + 2 tablespoons)

7 grams kosher salt

Combine, cover and place over low heat. After 15 minutes take a peek. If the water doesn’t seem to be absorbing, re-cover, boost the heat a little and cook another 15 minutes. If at any time you see steam shooting out around from the lid, the heat’s too high. Don’t stir during cooking! If you want to add fruit, do so after cooking. Simply kill the heat, place the fruit on top of the oatmeal mixture, re-cover and wait 5 minutes.

Always Perfect Oatmeal

Buttermilk Lassi

Buttermilk Lassi

FEEDS 2

Although I’ve never personally been to the Indian subcontinent, I’m a huge fan of the various dairy-based beverages that go by the name “lassi.” Most include yogurt and fruit of some type. My favorite home version is built instead on buttermilk, which I always seem to have left over from biscuit making, and mangoes, whose funky terpene flavors (kinda like pinesap) balance the b.milk’s acidic snap.

12 ounces cubed mangoes (2 large specimens M)

2 cups buttermilk

1 tablespoon freshly grated ginger

½ teaspoon chile powder

½ teaspoon kosher salt

4 frozen lassi cubes

½ ripe cantaloupe, cubed

1 peach, peeled and pitted, or 1 cup frozen peach slices

½ cup plain low-fat yogurt

1-inch-long hunk fresh ginger

½ cup almond milk

½ teaspoon ground turmeric

Combine the mangoes, buttermilk, ginger, chile powder and salt in a blender. Puree until smooth. Serve immediately.

Or…

Freeze in ice cube trays H and use to make one of my favorite morning smoothies:

Place the lassi cubes, cantaloupe, peach, yogurt, ginger, almond milk, and turmeric in a blender. Blend until smooth, drink, and face a grateful planet.

Buttermilk Lassi

Blueberry Pound Cake

Blueberry Pound Cake

MAKES 1 BUNDT CAKE, FEEDS 12

The best cakes are cakes that can arguably be served as breakfast, and this pound cake is a prime example. After all, it contains eggs and dairy and flour and fruit. Serve a thick slice, toasted golden brown, slathered with butter and sprinkled with sea salt, alongside a steamy cup of joe and go forth into your day knowing that no matter what else doesn’t get done in your day, you got your cake in. Go you!

8 ounces (2 sticks) plus 1 tablespoon unsalted butter, at room temperature

15 ounces plus 2 tablespoons sugar

15 ounces all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking powder

½ teaspoon kosher salt

4 large eggs, at room temperature

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 dry pint fresh blueberries (10 ounces or about 2 cups)

1. Heat the oven to 325˚F. Coat a Bundt pan with 1 tablespoon of the butter and 2 tablespoons of the sugar M.

2. Cream the remaining 8 ounces butter and remaining 15 ounces sugar in a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment on medium for 5 minutes. Meanwhile, sift together 10 ounces of the flour, the baking powder and salt onto a paper plate H.

3. When the butter mixture is pale and fluffy, drop the mixer speed to low and add the eggs, one at a time, waiting for each to be incorporated before adding the next. Follow with the vanilla extract. Then slowly add the flour mixture.

4. Toss the blueberries with the remaining 5 ounces flour. Remove the mixing bowl and fold the berries and flour into the batter with a large rubber spatula. Pour the mixture into the prepared pan.

5. Bake for 75 minutes, or until an instant-read thermometer H registers 210˚F. Cool in the pan on a cooling rack for 15 minutes before de-panning and cooling.

6. Serve with…your hands.

Blueberry Pound Cake

Pho Bo (Beef Pho)

FEEDS 4 TO 6

In the United States we have breakfast cereal. There are dozens of different types and styles and we all have our special ways of eating them. In Vietnam, they have pho. Pho equals breakfast cereal. Cook and eat accordingly.

Notice the broth calls for three cuts of beef. You can fudge a bit one way or the other, but I really think this combination makes for a superlative broth, and although the word “pho” actually refers to the rice noodles, the dish is really all about the broth.

BEEF BROTH

1 cinnamon stick

6 whole cloves

2 pods star anise P

1 teaspoon whole fennel seed

2-ounce chunk fresh ginger, roughly crushed…don’t bother peeling

1 onion, cut into thick slices

3 pounds mixed beef shanks and oxtails

1 pound chicken wings

½ large Fuji apple, don’t bother peeling

5 teaspoons kosher salt

2 tablespoons fish sauce P

1 tablespoon palm sugar

TO SERVE

8 ounces eye of round, sirloin steak or London broil, thinly sliced

14 ounces thin rice noodles or “sticks” in the 116-inch range (banh pho P)

3 scallions, thinly sliced

2 Thai bird chiles, thinly sliced

1 cup bean sprouts

2 cups fresh herbs, including cilantro, Thai basil and mint

2 limes, quartered

SPECIAL EQUIPMENT

Pressure cooker H M, which you should totally have anyway.

1. In a large pressure cooker, toast the spices over medium-high heat until fragrant.

2. Add the ginger and onion and blacken slightly (some of the spices may burn a bit and that’s just fine).

3. Add the meat and bones, wings, apple, salt and 10 cups of water. Apply the lid according to your cooker’s instructions and bring to full pressure over medium heat. Once the cooker is steaming and whistling, back down on the heat to just maintain full pressure and cook for 30 minutes.

4. Meanwhile, place the eye of round in the freezer for 20 minutes to firm it up, then slice the meat very thinly across the grain. Cover and refrigerate while the broth continues to cook.

5. Remove the broth from the heat and allow to cool naturally for 5 minutes, then slowly remove the pressure.

6. Carefully remove the lid and fish out the meat, vegetables and spices from the broth. Save the shanks and oxtails for serving. Use a fine-mesh strainer to skim any small particles and/or scum from the broth. Stir in the fish sauce and palm sugar.

7. When they’re cool enough to handle, slice the cooked shanks.

8. Everything above this line can be done up to a day ahead. When you’re ready to eat, read on.

9. Soak the rice noodles in cold water for 30 minutes, then drain. Meanwhile, bring a large pot of water to a boil.

10. When you’re really ready to serve, cook the noodles in the water for 10 to 15 seconds so that they are still a bit chewy. Drain thoroughly in a spider H.

11. Distribute the noodles into wide soup bowls (better be deep too) and top with the slices of (raw) eye of round and a few pieces of the cooked beef.

12. Cover with hot broth. Serve with the scallions, chiles, sprouts, herbs and limes and let diners garnish as desired.

Pho Bo (Beef Pho)

Oatmeal Banana Bread

MAKES 1 LOAF, FEEDS 10

There are more than eight million recipes for banana bread on the Interwebs. Most of them are insipid and mushy. Due to the inclusion of toasted oats, this one is definitely not. And it’s darned nutritious to boot.

168 grams old-fashioned rolled oats

84 grams all-purpose flour

6 grams baking soda

1 gram baking powder

¼ teaspoon kosher salt

112 grams unsalted butter, at room temperature

224 grams sugar

2 large eggs

½ teaspoon vanilla extract

238 grams mashed very ripe bananas (2 to 3 bananas)*

1. Heat the oven to 350°F.

2. Coat a 9 × 5-inch loaf pan with nonstick cooking spray and set aside.

3. Spread the oats in a thin layer on a half sheet pan and bake for 15 minutes, or until lightly toasted. Remove the pan and cool the oats for 2 to 3 minutes.

4. Grind the oats in a food processor until the consistency of whole wheat flour, about 3 minutes. Then pulse in the flour, baking soda, baking powder and salt.

5. Cream the butter and sugar in a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment on medium until pale and fluffy, about 3 minutes.

6. Drop the speed to low and add the eggs, one at a time, incorporating each fully before adding the next.**

7. Follow with the vanilla and bananas, and beat on medium-low until incorporated. The batter will look kind of curdled, but that’s okay.

8. Add the flour mixture and beat on low speed just until combined.

9. Transfer the batter into the prepared pan and bake for 50 to 55 minutes, until the internal temperature reaches 200° to 210°F.

10. Cool the pan on a rack for 15 minutes before turning the loaf out and cooling completely.

* If your bananas aren’t very ripe, roast them skin on in a 300°F oven for 40 minutes, until blackened and soft.

** Remember, a good batter is essentially an emulsion, so add those eggs slowly so that the water and fat phases have time to come together.

Oatmeal Banana Bread

BCLT Tacos
(Blackened Catfish Lettuce Tomato)

FEEDS 4

It’s generally accepted that the technique of “blackening” was created in the early eighties by Paul Prudhomme at Commander’s Palace in New Orleans, and then perfected at K-Paul’s. The concept is simple—apply a potent mixture of herbs and spices to fish and slap the fish on a very, very hot surface, then cook it very quickly. Blackened redfish became so popular at K-Paul’s that it was often credited with nearly wiping out the redfish populations in the Gulf of Mexico. Personally, I vastly prefer blackened farm-raised catfish to redfish. Especially when it’s in a taco.

CREMA*

1 cup sour cream

Zest of 1 lime

1 tablespoon fresh lime juice

1 garlic clove, minced

½ cup packed fresh basil

1 chipotle chile in adobo P

TACOS

4 teaspoons blackening powder P

1 pound farm-raised U.S. catfish (3 to 4 fillets)

8 corn tortillas

2 cups shredded romaine lettuce

2 medium tomatoes, diced

1. To make the crema, combine the sour cream, lime zest, lime juice, garlic, basil and chipotle chile in a small food processor and process until smooth. Refrigerate until ready to use.

2. Sprinkle the blackening powder evenly onto the catfish fillets and set aside for 20 minutes.

3. To prepare the tacos, place a cast-iron skillet H M over high heat. When you think it’s really hot, leave it for a few more minutes. If you turn the lights off and it glows…you’re ready.

4. Add the catfish to the pan and cook until crisped and blackened, about 1 minute. Flip and cook another minute, then rest the fish on a plate off the heat for 1 minute. The fish should be opaque inside and flake easily when broken with a fork.

5. Turn the heat off and use the residual heat to warm the tortillas, or if you like a little more char, lay them, one at a time, right over gas burners set to low for about 30 seconds a side.

6. Break the cooked fish up into several pieces and serve inside the tortillas topped with the lettuce, tomatoes and crema mixture.

* A Mexican form of cultured sour cream, crema is closer in viscosity to crème fraîche. Purists will argue that using sour cream is cheating. I’m okay with that.

BCLT Tacos

Little Brown Biscuits

MAKES FOURTEEN 2-INCH BISCUITS

Down South, biscuits are powerful symbols of culture as well as calling cards for cooks who know that regardless of what you’ve got in the pantry, technique holds sway. Now I’m not about to crown this my definitive biscuit—that’s still somewhere out beyond the horizon—but this is now my go-to, everyday biscuit. The combo of AP and whole wheat pastry flour gives these biscuits both a tender texture and nutty flavor.

Though cold shortening or supermarket lard can be used, I prefer leaf lard. Leaf lard is the prime lard rendered from the abdominal fat around a pig’s kidneys.

2 ounces plus 1 teaspoon nonhydrogenated leaf lard P

5 ounces all-purpose flour plus more for shaping

5 ounces whole wheat pastry flour

4 teaspoons baking powder

2 teaspoons kosher salt

1 cup cold buttermilk

1. Heat the oven to 450˚F. Coat a 9-inch straight-sided aluminum cake pan with 1 teaspoon of the lard.

2. Whisk the all-purpose flour, whole wheat pastry flour, baking powder and salt together in a large bowl. Quickly cut in the remaining 2 ounces lard until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Using a large wide spatula, stir in the buttermilk until the dough just comes together. The dough will be very loose and shaggy.

3. Dump the dough onto a lightly floured counter, fold it over onto itself 6 to 8 times, and pat into ½-inch thickness. Dip a 2-inch biscuit cutter or a 2-inch ring cutter H into the flour and cut out biscuits. Press the cutter straight down and do not twist! Place the biscuits in the prepared pan so they are just touching one another and the sides of the pan. Fold together the remaining dough and repeat cutting. Press down lightly into the center of each biscuit with a fingertip.

4. Set the pan on the middle rack of the oven and then boost the oven to 500˚F. Bake for 12 to 14 minutes, until golden brown. Cool for 3 minutes in the pan before devouring.

Little Brown Biscuits

Grits with Shrimp

FEEDS 4

Just like real Charlestonians during shrimp season, I consume this more at breakfast than dinner. If you want to follow suit, try soaking the grits overnight to shorten the cooking time. Oh, and since the grits are all too often neglected here, I put them first in the title.

2 pounds large, head-on, tail-on shrimp (I prefer 31/35 count but 20/25 will do too)*

6 cups water

1 tablespoon kosher salt

2 to 3 bay leaves

1 cup stone-ground grits (I prefer Anson Mills)

1 tablespoon unsalted butter

1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice

2 teaspoons hot sauce

1 teaspoon Old Bay Seasoning

4 rashers bacon

4 scallions, finely chopped

1. Remove the heads and tails from the shrimp and save for making shrimp broth. Devein the shrimp and refrigerate while making the shrimp broth. Rinse the shrimp shells with cool water.

2. Heat a 4-quart pot over medium-high heat. Add the shrimp shells and cook until pink. Cover with the water and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat to a simmer and continue to cook, uncovered, for 45 minutes to an hour (looking for this to reduce to 1 quart). Strain the broth and cool over an ice bath.

3. Combine the cooled broth with the salt and bay leaves, whisking until the salt is dissolved. Set the grits in a 4-quart pot and top with the shrimp. Cover the grits and shrimp with the brine and stash in the fridge for at least 6 hours or overnight.

4. After the 6-hour brine: Remove any chaffs or hulls from the grits that may be floating on the surface. Remove the shrimp from the brine.

5. Bring the grits to a simmer over medium-high heat, whisking continuously until the grits boil, to avoid lumps. Reduce the heat and cook the grits for 30 to 35 minutes, until tender and creamy. Add the butter and stir to combine. Cover to keep warm while cooking the shrimp.

6. Toss the shrimp with the lemon juice, hot sauce and Old Bay. Set aside.

7. Cook the bacon in a large cast-iron skillet H M over medium-high heat until crisp. Remove from the pan to paper towels to drain. Add the shrimp and cook until pink, about 2 minutes per side. Coarsely chop the bacon, return it to the pan, and add the scallions. Stir to combine.

8. To serve, ladle the grits into a bowl and scatter the shrimp and bacon mixture over.

* I don’t like to preach at folks about where they buy their groceries, but the U.S. has the best shrimp in the world, so stop buying those cheap “tiger” shrimp from China.

Grits with Shrimp

Chilaquiles!

FEEDS 4

Like so many dishes of Mexican provenance, chilaquiles are sublime yet simple…little more than a stovetop casserole of tortillas and salsa. But simplicity isn’t always “easy,” and to pull it off you’ll need a solid salsa (I always have my Roasted Chile Salsa on hand) and a good cast-iron skillet.

2 tablespoons vegetable oil

6 medium corn tortillas, each torn into 4 to 6 pieces

12 ounces Roasted Chile Salsa

½ teaspoon kosher salt

4 large eggs

¼ cup crumbled cotija cheese

1 tablespoon chopped fresh cilantro

1. Place a rack about 6 inches under the broiler and heat your broiler to high.

2. Heat the vegetable oil over medium heat in a 10- to 12-inch cast-iron skillet H M until the oil barely shimmers. Add the tortilla pieces, a few at a time, to the pan. Once they’re all in, they’ll overlap, but move them around and flip them with tongs H every now and then and they’ll fry evenly.

3. When the chips are crisp and slightly brown around the edges, ladle in the salsa and ¼ teaspoon of the salt. If you prefer your chilaquiles on the crunchy side, go with 9 ounces of the salsa; if you like them soft, as I do, go with 12.

4. Reduce the heat and allow the salsa to simmer and absorb into the chips a bit, 5 minutes. Since they’re fried, the chips will hold together, forming layers.

5. Arrange the softened tortillas so that you can crack the eggs evenly across the surface, one in each quarter of the pan. Sprinkle with the remaining ¼ teaspoon salt.

6. Park the pan under the broiler for 3 minutes, or until the whites set. The yolks will (hopefully) still be a bit runny.

7. Remove the skillet and scatter the surface of the chilaquiles with the cheese and cilantro. Deliver to the table and serve right out of the skillet.

Chilaquiles!

Overnight Coconut Oats

FEEDS 1

This is one of those dishes that is so nutritiously sound, it oughta taste terrible. But, alas…it’s pretty damned fantastic. I have to give some credit to Yvonne, the craft services lady on Cutthroat Kitchen, though. She serves up a version of this every morning, with oats and coconut soaked in almond milk. I think she would have given me her recipe had I not driven a tank into her station. It’s a long story.

75 grams coconut milk

75 grams unsweetened almond milk

12 grams maple syrup

¼ teaspoon vanilla extract

40 grams old-fashioned rolled oats

30 grams dried fruit, such as cranberries, cherries or blueberries. No raisins please.

2 grams chia seeds P

3 grams flaxseed meal P

Pinch of kosher salt

Pinch of cinnamon

13 grams toasted coconut flakes

1. In a 16-ounce jar, stir the coconut milk and almond milk together with the maple syrup and vanilla.

2. Weigh the oats, dried fruit, chia seeds, flaxseed meal, salt and cinnamon onto a paper plate H. Mix around with a fork, then fold the plate into a U and pour into the jar.

3. Apply the lid and shake to combine. Refrigerate overnight.

4. Serve right in the jar, topped with the toasted coconut.

Overnight Coconut Oats

Nitrous Pancakes

MAKES EIGHT 3-INCH PANCAKES, FEEDS 2

One day I was walking through the megamart, and there in the dairy section I spied a can of aerosol pancake mix…like Reddi-wip, but pancake mix. And I thought: GENIUS! And I took it home and cooked it and it was crap. But what an idea! Luckily, we have a nitrous oxide (N2O) cream whipper in our possession. You’ll notice that the ingredients below are in grams. That’s because accuracy here really matters. So break out the digital scale H.

180 grams all-purpose flour

220 grams buttermilk

2 large eggs

52 grams sugar

1 tablespoon canola oil

1 tablespoon vanilla extract

¾ teaspoon kosher salt

1 tablespoon unsalted butter or, better, Clarified Butter M

SPECIAL EQUIPMENT

1 liter whipped cream siphon H

N2O charger

Electric skillet

1. Whisk the flour, buttermilk, eggs, sugar, canola oil, vanilla and salt together and use a funnel to pour the mixture into the whipped cream siphon; do not fill above the maximum fill line. Lid the whipped cream siphon, charge with an N2O charger and shake vertically 15 to 20 times. Set aside for 20 minutes.

2. Heat an electric skillet to 350°F. Melt a teaspoon of butter in the skillet. Invert the whipped cream siphon and (carefully) dispense a 3-inch round of batter for each pancake, keeping at least 2 inches open between them. Cook for 1 minute per side, or until golden brown. Repeat for the remaining batter.

3. I would tell you how to serve them, but you already know, don’t you.

Nitrous Pancakes

Nitrous Pancakes

Mr. Crunchy

FEEDS 4

If you invert those two words of the title and translate to French, you get croque monsieur, one of the world’s great sandwiches. If you’ve never had one, it’s essentially a griddle ham sandwich, smeared in béchamel sauce and topped with a lot of Gruyère cheese, that is then broiled to golden brown, semi-crusty gooiness. Yeah…what could be wrong with that? Mr. Crunchy is packed with fat, so the way I figure it, you’d better make all those calories count by constructing this sandwich as painstakingly perfectly as possible. For me that means making your own herbes de Provence blend and taking great care with every step of the process. Your patience will indeed be rewarded.

BÉCHAMEL*

2 tablespoons (¼ stick) unsalted butter

1 ounce all-purpose flour

8 ounces whole milk

1 teaspoon fresh thyme leaves

½ teaspoon kosher salt

½ teaspoon ground white pepper

¼ teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg P

SANDWICHES

4 slices sourdough bread, cut ½ inch thick

1 tablespoon whole grain mustard

8 ounces thinly sliced black forest ham

8 ounces grated Gruyère cheese

2 teaspoons herbes de Provence blend P

1. Melt the butter in a small saucepan over medium heat. Whisk in the flour and cook for 2 minutes, whisking occasionally, until the roux smells nutty. Whisk in the milk, thyme, salt, white pepper and nutmeg. Cook the milk mixture, whisking to smooth, until thickened. Set the sauce aside to cool and thicken slightly more while preparing the sandwiches.

2. Set the top rack 6 inches under the broiler and heat the broiler to high. Line a half sheet pan with aluminum foil H, spray with a little nonstick cooking spray, and set the bread slices on the pan. Spread the mustard on the bread slices.

3. Top the bread slices with 2 ounces each of the ham. Cover the ham evenly with the béchamel and top each with 2 ounces Gruyère. Sprinkle each sandwich with ½ teaspoon herbes de Provence. Broil these open-face sandwiches for 2 to 3 minutes, or until the cheese is melted and lightly browned.

4. Serve with a knife and fork and plenty of napkins.

Note: If you add a fried egg to the top of the sandwich, it becomes a croque madame.

* About the Béchamel
One of the French “mother sauces,” béchamel is essentially roux-thickened milk seasoned with white pepper and nutmeg. Without it, Mr. Crunchy just isn’t a croque monsieur.

Mr. Crunchy

Scrambled Eggs V3.0

FEEDS 2 AS PART OF A BALANCED BREAKFAST OR 1 AS A NOT QUITE SO BALANCED BUT REALLY DELICIOUS BREAKFAST

Eggs never cease to amaze me. Whenever I grow weary of cooking, or of eating for that matter, eggs revive me. My favorite form to serve them: the humble scramble. I’ve filled an entire journal over the years as I’ve theorized and experimented with different hypotheses. But in the end, it’s version 3.0 that I keep coming back to.

3 large eggs

1 teaspoon water

1 teaspoon mayonnaise*

½ teaspoon harissa paste

⅛ teaspoon kosher salt

1 teaspoon unsalted butter

SPECIAL EQUIPMENT

Well-cured cast-iron skillet H M in the 10- to 12-inch range

An infrared thermometer H**

Oh, and a basting brush of some type

1. Place the skillet over medium heat and bring the surface temperature to 380ºF. This should take 3 to 5 minutes. Why not high heat? Because you’re more likely to shoot right through the target temperature, that’s why.

2. Meanwhile, whisk together the eggs, water, mayonnaise, harissa and salt until a light and homogenized mixture is formed.

3. When the surface of the pan hits 380ºF, turn off the heat and add the butter. Use the basting brush to push it around to quickly coat the entire bottom of the pan as the butter melts.

4. As soon as the butter melts, pour in the egg mixture and count to 10. Stir with a rubber spatula and count to 5. Stir again to get any remaining liquid down into the pan and count to 5.

5. Transfer the finished eggs to plates, and consume. Note, please, the silky texture and hint of spice.

Have a nice day.

* Since scrambled eggs are essentially an emulsion, I figure why not enhance their texture with another emulsion? The results are creamier than egg, or even egg and dairy alone, can produce. You’ll never know the mayo is in there until you go and leave it out.

** Why? For this to work properly, you need an iron pan because the technique depends on high heat retention and a black surface. Why black? Because black surfaces give the most reliable results when you are measuring temperature with an infrared thermometer. If you don’t have one, an infrared thermometer looks like a little ray gun and most do have lasers in them to tell you exactly where you’re measuring. You pull the trigger and it reads the actual surface of the pan. You can order up a good specimen for around fifty dollars online. I’m particularly fond of those manufactured by ThermoWorks.

Scrambled Eggs V3.0

New Year’s…Southern-Style

FEEDS 4 TO 6

All good Southerners know that you best serve up a pot of greens and some black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day else there won’t be no cash money (that’s the collards) and no coins (the peas) through the coming year. And, of course, corn bread means…corn bread.

THE GREENS

Makes about 2 quarts

4 bunches collard greens*

2 teaspoons kosher salt

2 teaspoons red pepper flakes P

¼ cup vegetable oil

¼ cup red wine vinegar

1 smoked ham hock

FOR THE GREENS

1. Fill your sink with cold water and tear the greens off the ribs. I usually get about 6 pieces off each leaf. Slosh the leaves around in the water to remove any dirt/bugs/et cetera and tear up the big pieces as you go. You don’t cut collards with a knife…’less you’re a Yankee.

2. Put your pressure cooker H over high heat. Transfer enough greens to the cooker to fill it halfway. Don’t drain or dry the leaves, as the water will become the cooking liquid and thus the pot liquor that embodies the soul of the dish. Cook the greens until they wilt and turn bright green, about 5 minutes. Remove to a large bowl and repeat with the remaining greens.

3. Move all of the greens back to the cooker and stir in the salt, red pepper flakes, vegetable oil and vinegar. Finally, nestle the ham hock within the greens. Affix the lid (check the manual). Once the cooker comes to pressure, releasing steam in a constant stream, reduce the heat to low and cook for 30 minutes, maintaining an even “hiss.”

4. Kill the heat and release the pressure on the cooker. (Most modern cookers use a spring-loaded device or valve that will vent off the pressure.) If you don’t want to wait, simply move to the sink and spray the lid and sides with cold water. Once the pressure lock is released, open the cooker and use tongs H to remove the greens to a bowl. Leave the hock and the liquid inside and reaffix the lid. Bring the cooker back to pressure over high heat, then reduce the heat to low and cook for another 30 minutes.

5. Release the pressure and open the cooker. At this point the hock will be very broken down and the liquid will be fragrant. Remove the hock and allow it to cool enough to peel off the outer layer of fat and pick the meat off the bone. Stir that and the greens back into the broth.

6. Serve, or cool and freeze….Collards freeze well.

THE BLACK-EYED PEAS

Makes about 1 quart

20 ounces fresh (as in not dried) black-eyed peas

½ onion, chopped (5 ounces)

1 tablespoon kosher salt

1 tablespoon dried Italian herb mix

1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

1 tablespoon unsalted butter

FOR THE BLACK-EYED PEAS

1. Place the black-eyed peas in a saucepan and add water to cover by 2 inches. Bring to a boil over medium-high heat. A lot of nasty foam will be created, so once the water reaches a boil, remove the pan from the heat and use a spoon to remove the foam. Drain the peas in a colander and rinse with cold water.

2. Return the peas to the pan and add enough water to cover by 1 inch. Stir in the onion, salt, herb mix, pepper and butter. Bring to a boil over high heat, then reduce the heat to maintain a bare simmer, stirring often until the beans are soft, 60 to 90 minutes.

3. Serve the peas in a small bowl with plenty of the pot liquor.

THE CORN BREAD

Makes one 8-inch corn bread

Since this corn bread contains flour, it would be considered “fancy” or “city” corn bread.

1 cup white cornmeal P

1 cup all-purpose flour

¼ cup sugar

1 tablespoon baking powder

1 tablespoon kosher salt

2 large eggs

⅓ cup vegetable oil

1¼ cups buttermilk

FOR THE CORN BREAD

1. Heat the oven to 400°F. Lightly oil an 8-inch cast-iron skillet H M and place in the oven to heat for at least 30 minutes. If you overoil the pan, there will be some smoke, but trust me, you want that pan hot.

2. Whisk the cornmeal, flour, sugar, baking powder and salt together in a large bowl. Whisk the eggs, vegetable oil and buttermilk together in another bowl. Add the egg mixture to the cornmeal mixture and mix roughly together with a spatula. Carefully pour the batter into the hot skillet and bake for 25 minutes, or until golden brown and just set in the center.

3. Turn out the finished bread onto a cutting board and cool for 3 minutes before cutting and serving with plenty of butter (or, if you’re hard core, crushed up in a bowl of buttermilk).

4. Serve these three dishes together and get ready to be all kinds of rich in the new year. As for the beverage of choice: iced sweet tea or beer. There isn’t a wine that goes with collards.

* A bunch is typically 1½ to 2 pounds. So the four bunches called for here should fill a standard kitchen sink (21″×16″×7″).

New Year’s…Southern-Style

The Griswald Manufacturing Co. of Erie, PA, made cast-iron for nearly 100 years. If you find any buy it and send to me!

The Griswold Manufacturing Co. of Erie, PA, made cast-iron for nearly 100 years. If you find any buy it and send to me!

COFFEF BREAK